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Dave Harvey recommends that before we inspect ourselves, we should suspect ourselves. Instead of coming to tense relationships with a presumption of innocence, I should assume in a relational conflict that I likely sinned in some way. (And if I’m later proved wrong, that’s fine.) With an assumption of probable guilt, I am more apt to vigorously examine myself. This does not mean that I am the only or primary contributor to a conflict; it does mean that I have likely contributed to the problem, and I need to see how.

Robert Jones, Pursuing Peace